MilkManzJourDaddy

^{(This article was originally written by and from the perspective of fuckjuice, but has since been touched up by other editors)}

MilkManzJourDaddy (mmjd for short) aka MilkManzJourJannie has to be by far the most autistic user on all of matrix consequently he earns the title of the best lolcow. To begin he has a diary room that should be referred to as the “Jannie's Laments” in which he documents each and every action performed by that BIG ness fella, myself or anyone else who has dared to question his authority (of which he has none) he often writes copy pasta tier monologues on the most minute or mundane of our actions(such as joining or leaving a room). He is a confirmed pedophile and runs a room with #teensexuality:matrix.org reserved as an alias. The best way to get under the milk manz skin is to call him a janitor on the internet and remind him of his paycheck, to counter these barbarous attacks and to make sure he doesn't have an asthma attack whenever he leaves one of his 50 ☞ ؟⸮UNOFFICIAL⸮؟ echo chamber rooms, where he has total control and can SHUT IT DOWN at any moment he has proposed the "Jannies rule" in which anyone who dare speaketh the forbidden word shall be silenced via a ban. On the topic of bans he will ban anyone on sight who doesn't mention the rooms name or the size of his monster 4 inch dong every message or so for “off-topic” conversations. Even simply saying hi is far too much for his Jannie's Laments room, this is due to the fact he takes his “job” very seriously and has described his chat room as “no place for socialising”. This actually how I first came to the realisation that he is as mad as a hatter. Rubberbutter and I joined the room said hello then proceeded to call him a jannie due to his removal of our greeting messages. After about a dozen or so messages he did what he does best and banned us, (this is the only amount of power and control he will ever have in his pathetic life), then pinged our homeserver admins demanding account deactivations for this “raid”. This sort of behaviour only served to motivate the glowers and I to actually raid him and to actually fuck with him, for real, over and over, the more you poke the more he reacts a never ending supply of laughs. Put simply: nutty control freak jannie who does it for free is buttmad.

Mmjd has been on matrix for years, presumably acting in the exact same manner as he currently does. His only notable achievement is doxing baffy (commie, pedo, furfag, regular fag etc) a while back. He runs an insane amount of “unofficial” rooms around matrix such as #F_Droid:matrix.org with there addresses reserved across each server. They are extremely inactive, with the activity of most looking something like this and autism central as a result of his presence alone. He actually joined the original encrypted glowers back when it was still used, but no one bothered paying much attention to him due to his seldom posting making most believe an exaggerated character was being played. You wouldn't believe someone genuinely communicated in such a ☞ ؟⸮way⸮؟outside the occasional shitpost now would you, but this lunatic truly does. He once got into a fight with Adolf Honkler (due to his stance on mgtow), then proceeded to make one of his usual copy pasta tier attacks on him in the staff lounge. Eventually their conflict was resolved via dms and mmjd pointed him to some users befitting of our rooms, which actually could have played a tiny part in the foundation of glowers.

Here is a list of his known public rooms in case you're ever bored one day and feel like raiding, trolling or just throwing out a good old fashioned jannie (which I absolutely condone and encourage). I wouldn't expect much of a response from him in person other than a potentially humourous ban reason, due to the fact he uses his diary room to wail over such things but if I see one of his laments I'll be sure to post it here. I also wouldn't expect some sort of response from anyone else due to the fact his rooms are dead and mainly consist of him messing with there settings, inviting one of his 50,000 alt accounts, banning users that likely coughed in a manner he didn't approve of in a completely unrelated place or a bot posting links to videos. You'll also notice he has added "ZERO TOLERANCE FOR ANTI-MODERATION!!!" in quite a few of the descriptions for his rooms, so hopefully the RSS bot's and his stance on those damn jannie posters is crystal clear to the only sort of people joining his rooms… the jannie posters! That is of course because the only thing that would serve to motivate a man to join one of these rooms is his desire to milk the lolcow. Though strangely by some odd mix of self-deception and narcissism he believes them to be “the broader community”. Here we can see a recent pitiful attempt at enrollment and here we can see the activity before and of course finallyhere is the activity since, can't you just smell the desperation, it seems at some level in the recesses of his mind he realises believing his rooms to be of any significance is delusional. If any of these addresses are broken due to his removal out of fears of raiding try replacing the matrix.org with matrix.ordoevangelistarum.com or adding/removing the capital letters from words and if that still fails try hackerspaces.be or chat.weho.st then lastly if all else fails contact me and I'll try searching for a new and working one, if found I will update the page accordingly. The more fanciful addresses are due to our previous escapades.

• #MGTOW:matrix.org
• #Qubes:matrix.org
• #OS:matrix.org
• #adulteducation:matrix.org
• #darkrouteroom4now:matrix.org
• #wISPs:matrix.org
• #asteroid_os:matrix.org
• #atpp:matrix.org
• #etiquette:matrix.org
• #F_Droid:matrix.org
• #hubzillaunofficial:matrix.org
• #jami:matrix.org
• #lineage:matrix.org
• #IceWeasel:matrix.org
• #TrumpIsARapist:matrix.org
• #replicant_os:matrix.org
• #imperialunits:matrix.org
• #sailfishos:matrix.org
• #english:matrix.org
• #fuckmmJd:matrix.org
• #teslaturbine:matrix.org

So as mentioned prior rubberbutter and I joined his regulators room(aka his cry baby diary room: Jannie's laments) said hello then proceeded to call him a jannie due to his removal of our greeting messages. No more than a dozen messages were sent yet mmjd believed this to be an organised raid and a direct attack on him. He proceeded to flip his shit and reeeee harder than I've ever seen anyone reeeee before. He banned The Flawless Gazelles with the reasoning being “Ten to one odds you brought the OTHER idiots in here”, it seems he is far better suited to getting down on his hands and knees and cleaning up our shit opposed to betting, because Flawless had nothing to do with our discovery of the King Kleaner. He started inviting and pinging the homeserver admins (including tristan when a nerdsin.space account wasn't even involved) and demanding multilateral banning for these “raiders” everywhere.

Behold our “raid” in all its glory: incursion

After our merciless invasion he decided to change the power level required to post then manually alter every members power with the hopes that a “second strike” would be prevented. When we first joined his room we honestly had no intentions other than saying hi, so if he didn't act bat shit insane and respond in such a crazy fashion the entire glowers mmjd ordeal would have never happened and this page wouldn't even exist.

So this section will be rather short since avf handled the kooky kleaner is a superb fashion, by basically telling him to fuck off. Mmjd says a coordinated attack happened, avf tells him to simply ban the two guys, mmjd repeats “NO NO IT WAS A RAID”, avf informs him dealing with the 5 messages rubberbutter sent above is a waste of his time and then mmjd concludes avf condones raiding on his homeserver and later goes on to acl ban 200acres.Here is the full interaction just read it yourself and here is the acl ban.

Once we saw his visceral, pained response to being called a jannie The glowers and I decided to follow our best instincts and hop around from room to room calling him… yes thats right a JANNIE. Here we can see me doing it in the halogen general discussion room, here I do it again in nerdsin.space and here's a team effort. When I was questioned as to why I was doing such a thing I explained how deranged he was, subsequently others not involved in the original event began to pile on. Since MilkManzJourJannie has zero power and influence in any room outside of his own and since the humiliation and torment was far too much for him to handle he decided to mute the rooms and burrow back into his safe space like a scared turtle. He decided to blame 200a for whatever reason despite the fact those dabbing on him were spread across various homeservers and it was primarily BIG ness and I after the initial ordeal wherein neither of us use a 200acres account. To counter our brutal onslaught he makes a proposition for the “jannie rule”. Here is the relevant screenshot. After this we decided to go three for three and head over to the kiwifarms general room, where we were met by good company, which only serves to reinforce this idea. SF also added the alias #braphog-central to the “Jannie's Laments” which seems rather fitting for a room dedicated to moderator circle jerks and loving the smell of your own flatulence, mmjd was not impressed.

Here I'll showcase some fun we or others have had with him since the initial fuckening or just silly shit he has said, because the chronology of events just turns into, person does thing, mmjd cries, we laugh, repeat. The jannie gets raided and meme aliases are spammed that remain in the Jannie's Laments to this day. Here we can see mmjd's take on why people troll, it's of course due to the public education system, yes I can see the light now it all makes sense, if only we had the perfect society ruled by jannies then no one would ever want to mess around for laughs. Ebola has a nice heart to heart with him. Mmjd's charismatic effect on people. I go to make fun of the jannie then marymoon decides to join in since mmjd is a pussy scared of confrontation (unless he has the ability to ban someone) he scurried back to his room and banned them (from a room they never intended to use). The reasoning: toxic hate speech. I go say hi to mmjd with my glorious new glowers.club account, he immediately runs back to his room and acl bans us, Shari Vegas reminds him that he is not cool, and instead of responding in the room he was told in he responds in his diary room, which Shari Vegas isn't even a part of, what a pathetic coward. The jannie interogates a new joiner. He gets dabbed on by draestyn. Woross dabs on the jannie which actually ended up ushering an age of friendship between pp13 and glowers, we found common ground and are united against mmjd's faggotry.

“This entire article, speaking of which tell me on matrix if you'd like to add any fan comments and I'll get them up”~fuckjuice

“i'm not in mmjjainned rooms for a reason”~Shari Vegas

“I’m done with him. He doesn’t matter at all. One thing NV and their sycophants were right about: MMJD is a cancer on the aborted fetus that is Matrix.”~ Thomas Lewis

“lol what a fucking faggot, jesus chris dude just like have sex, take a chill pill, this is the internet bro, its just a chat room for fun, stop taking things so seriously you fucking loser, lmao @ your life, im gonna go have sex with real women and play football, later niggergator”~funnydank

“just wanted you to know that you're an irrelevant jannie faggot who will never contribute anything worthwhile. You've been on Matrix for what, 4 years now? And you've still never even hosted your own server, nor done anything of value. You sit in your little diary room and moan about “bullies” while doing absolutely nothing about it other than banning them from a room they were never going to join any way. You should really just give up and leave. No one likes you. You never bring anyone any joy from being here, and I doubt you do so in real life either, so while you're at it, why not kill yourself?”~q

“I wanted butter but all he had is soured janny milk”~butterbutt

“whenever i think of mmjd i instinctively dab, like how a lion becomes alert at the slightest of sounds. i suspect i do this because dabbing on jannies is encoded into my dna.”~ms.cegination

“I think milkmanzjourjannie is a brilliant innovator and jew and am glad to be going with him to israel this winter”~Neevo

“weird autistic fag”~Illuminazi

“gay”~zx12

“Every one of the milk man's rooms are basically deleted “hello” messages and bans. Even the hello messages only come about once every few days. Every time someone talks, he sends them a link to a wiki he made as if he's got any actual authority”~stab kebab

“without mmjd's wisdom, I would have never acquired the mmjd mindset to finally quit women and become the gay fascist I was meant to be. I gave everything up and live on the streets because the last fucking thing im going to do in this world is let a woman get some free shit off of me. i cant say enough good things about the mmjd and the mgtow movement. its changed my life. I went from being forced to provide for a woman and now im scalping hookers weekly from my tent somewhere along highway 95. who knew life could get this good?”~ernie

“this janny buttmad”~GoyimNose

“Isn’t this that faggot that Thomas banned for being a total retard? I called him Milk Ma’am once and he politely corrected me.”~Kenny

“fuck jannies”~woross

“Mmjd needs hrt”~gamelone

“yeh jannies were bullied in high school so have to compensate, mmjd is hands down autistic and can't understand irony at all. fuck wignats fuck women fuck niggers fuck ants fuck spics fuck numales fuck atheists and most of all FUCK JANNIES. Oh and fuck labcoats. jannies deserve to be bullied. BRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPFFFFFFFFFFTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT”~Albie

“He was once in my plants channel and didn't say shit, so fuck him”~GRATS

“mmjd more like mgtow minge jour djannie. um just ban them? I mean, idk, mmjd should take it easy. Just hang out with us in VC on game nights. Also he should learn how alt accounts work”~AVF

“MMJD is like a brother to me, I hope the glowers stop messing with him and he can calm down at his own speed”~Adolf Honkler

“Major Major, Jannie Danger. Major Major, Jannie Danger”~Kakol

“We used to live in fear of right-wing nazis coming into our furry BDSM rooms and saying mean things to us. Since hiring MMJD-MXO as our janitor (for free), we've had the ability to e-sodomize each other all day long without those pesky trolls interrupting us.”~Draestyn

“mmjd = milk man jannie disaster”~crunch

“He's a fag”~omgcow

“He's a janitor, on the internet, on riot, he does it for free, he takes his “job” very seriously, he does it because it is the only amount of power and control he will ever have in his pathetic life, he bans people he doesn't like because whenever he gets upset he has an asthma attack, he bans people he doesn't like because they interfere with the large backlog of little girl chinese cartoons he still has to watch, he will never have a real job, he will never move out of his parent's house, he will never be at a healthy weight, he will never know how to cook anything besides a hot pocket, he will never have a girIfriend, he will never have any friends, his name is “Milkman”~Ebola

“Just look at that face. The face of a thinker. A warrior. A man for all seasons. Yes, MMJD was all that and more. But he was not perfect. Perhaps his greatest flaw was that he was too selfless. He cared too much for his fellow man, with nary a thought for himself. A man of limitless accomplishments, and unbridled modesty. I can safely say that to know him was to love him. And to love him was to know him. Those who knew him, loved him, while those who did not know him, loved him from afar.”~Sharp

“JANNIES, NO ANTI-JANNY RHETORIC ALLOWED, JANNIES ARE TRUE HEROES, no quotes, im just talking about JANNIES”~crunklord420

“no comment”~tristan

I think the voice message above really speaks of mmjd's character, tristan runs his own public homeserver with a good track record, while mmjd has contributed nothing he isn't talented, charismatic, good with tech or anything yet he tries to put himself above tristan is some pseudo authority, old fag jannie thing and is like “heh kid ive been stopping the jannie posters for years, I'm capable, I know what I'm doing, you can learn the ropes from me kid, RESPECT ME PLEASE NO ONES DOES IN REAL LIFE”. How pathetic could one man be Jesus.